notorious

my mirror.

my mirror and i have a fascinating relationship. every morning and every night it tells me who i am, even if i think i might be someone else.

as a child i always used to get confused when i looked at myself in the mirror. somehow i felt different from the person i would see in front of me. i would make faces and look at myself from all the different angles (the advantages of a folding mirror!) to find out what other people were seeing. it took me a long time to come to terms with that distinction between myself as i see it and myself other people see. i guess you get used to it...

now my mirror tells me - AGAIN! - that i have a notoriously red nose. yes it's burned because it's summer. but that's not it. i ALWAYS have a red nose. at high school my favourite teacher would always pull jokes (because of course i'm a notorious late-comer...), so that when i would enter the class room late as i was and with a red nose she would say: inga, must have been late last night, huh? too much to drink? ho ho ho. i would never really get embarrassed because she was allowed. i liked her. anyway, my point is: i always have a red nose.

my mirror also tells me i have notoriously unruly hair. it's curly and it's growing out. once when i was young it was pretty long but i'm over that. so now it's shoulder length and i'm thinking about letting it cut again. everybody tells me though i should let it grow. i mean, it's bloody inconvenient. even if everybody thinks it's so lovely and all... i don't know. i guess i have to think about it. like everyone else in this world i do care about what other people think. bloody inconvenient that is!

i could go on and on about mirrors and self-image and metaphorical implications but i'll spare you. it's late.

conclusion: mirrors are notoriously devious. they never tell you what you want to hear. or see. only sometimes. rarely. still, one can't do without, can one?

on that note, good night, sleep tight. and mirrorless dreams!

ps: i think notorious is a great word!

a question for my male readers

it is summer. many germans might dispute this fact, solely because a lot of the time it's either too cold or too hot, it's too dry or too rainy, and if none of these things apply it's too windy. there are many reasons why summer is never good enough. germans seem to have this pessimistic gene that never allows them to actually enjoy whatever is going on. there is always a reason to complain, huh! maybe it's not just german but then it is definitely very european, don't you agree?

anyway, back to the reason why i'm posting this today: summer is one thing, fashion another. male fashion in particular can be very disturbing, so here it is:

WHY do (some? many? most?) men wear shorts (because it is summer) and then pull their socks so high around their calves that there is almost no space for their skin to breathe let alone tan??? i mean not that i fancy looking at a lot of hairy and pale male legs but what is the problem with you guys? give your calves some space! especially in summer! are you afraid it might rain any minute so you're prepared for the cold?

well, maybe it's just pragmatic. isn't that what they say about both men and germans?

do what you have to do but PLEASE don't take the same morning train as me!!!

i wish!

... i had a pillow. with me. at ALL times!!!













my next day off is friday. i just want to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!! stay in bed the whole day, read, doze off, cuddle my pillow, read some more, maybe go for a walk, get or make something to eat, go back to bed or lie on the couch, read, doze off, cuddle my pillow etc.

i extremely dislike (previous phrase has been censored by myself) my alarm clock!!! that's the only downside with working weekends. it's gotten to the point that i wake up BEFORE my alarm clock!! can you believe it??? it's like the knowledge that i have to get up early is so stressful for me that i can't relax at all. instead i just wake up before my alarm clock has a chance to, just to stare at the time in disbelief, turn around and the moment i'm about to fall asleep again, the bloody thing pierces right through my dream world... (devoted readers might already know of my troubled relationship with mornings and alarm clocks).

WHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOHoooooooooooooohoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! right, i'm a whinger. yes. i know!

besides my being tired i am very excited about tonight! marieke's play SPIELTRIEB premieres tonight and i'll be witness to it! i hope she's still in one piece after several months of basically working two jobs. YOU ROCK, girl!!!

funny berlin

almost

most of the time i feel almost. almost happy, almost heartbroken, almost relieved, almost awake, almost in the mood for exercise, almost busy... in bed, in grass, in cars, in front of computers sitting on desks, listening to music vacuuming or writing...

what is left of most of the time are instances of joy, fear, hatred, love, desire, wholeness. little avalanches that flood my brain and tickle my toes.

AND THEN all of a sudden you hit your shin, you spill hot coffee on your lap, you get moved around like a soccer trophy, someone you love is too tired to talk, you get caught speeding (AGAIN!), the sun stops shining and you're sitting in your new office on a weekend while no-one's there except your most annyoing colleague.

it's may and horses snicker. yey!

turkish delights

1. rising early - despite the fact that it was supposed to be a holiday, we frequently got a wake-up call at six in the morning. it didn't matter that no-one had ever asked for any such thing...

2. smiling not recommended - politeness gives a lot of space for interpretation... too much space. especially for the male turk.

3. ancient greek history - apparently non-existent in the area of today's turkey. and if you wanna know why there are so many greek inscriptions on the ancient sites, the answer is very simple: greek writing was so popular back then that the romans used it too. latin was a dead language even in those times, hey!

4. please wear your blinkers - if you look around too much you might notice all the garbage on the side of the road... we love plastic bottles!!!

5. no bending over in jeans - if you do that you might find yourself asked by 3 fifty something male pigs if you could please solve the riddle: are you wearing underwear???

6. not in times of crisis - going on a package tour is a game of russian roulette in itself. relationship troubles diminish your chances of winning the game. severely!

7. home sweet home - there's no place like home, that's for sure!

BUT if you ignore points 1 to 7 one could say that it was a brilliant holiday...

doris day in da house

shey seraaaaaaaah, seraaaaaaaaaaaaaa, wotevaaaa willl beeeeeeeee will beeeeeeeee...

laughing hard, aerobics at work.

no one will probably get this but i'm in tears at the momenttttttttttt

i wish we would broadcast office.tv instead of pet.tv sometimes. it would be SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much better and funnier. believe me!